What about when my body DOES have problems? An interview with Rexann Hammons.

Our culture likes to paint the female body as an oppressor, a sinister villain opposed to all the dreams that women have for themselves. It is the nemesis who cunningly tries to foil all our chances at equality by menstruating, gestating, and lactating. In this scenario, birth control pills and devices, and abortions are the necessary liberators that will free women from the burden of being themselves. In opposition to what we feel is just another misogynist caricature of femininity, New Feminism aims to give honor and respect to the amazing abilities of our feminine bodies. We believe that any so-called progress that is won at the expense of our natural and healthy functioning, is not progress. It is in fact, another form of oppression. If we are ever to be recognized as true equals, we must not do so on on men’s terms and on the pretext that we incapacitate our normal and healthy functioning, but we must gain this recognition by being fully, and most wonderfully ourselves.

So while we seek to give due respect to the “Feminine Abilities” of ovulating, gestating, and lactating, the fact remains that some women are not able to do these things. Many women struggle with various menstrual disorders or infertility or struggle to breastfeed their infants. What about them? Does New Feminism throw them under the bus? Is New Feminism saying that they are not fully women or that they don’t have worth? As a New Feminist I believe that the answer is a resounding NO! but rather than hear about it from me, a mother of three who breastfed all her children, I think it would be great to hear from a woman who has struggled with some of these issues. It is with great excitement that I can share this interview with a dear friend of mine, Ms. Rexann Hammons. Rexann is a professional woman who works as a nurse. She has struggled for more than a decade with severe endometriosis.

Can you tell me a little bit about your health history?
In the fall of 2000 I was a senior in high school. I started experiencing pain in my abdomen that seemed to correspond to my periods. After several emergency room visits and a belittling diagnosis of constipation I was finally diagnosed with an ovarian cyst. I was thankful for the diagnosis because that meant my pain could be treated and I could be healed. I had surgery to remove the cyst. At that time I also started my first oral contraceptives to regulate my periods. This was a difficult decision at 17 to take something unnatural to my body. I was a young Catholic woman and didn’t want to be on contraceptives. I was somewhat comforted by my confessor who clarified that contraceptives were okay if used for medical. As my illness progressed I was placed on one form of contraceptive after another. In the Spring of 2001, I was diagnosed with dysmenorrhea, or painful periods. I proceeded to attempt to live life as a normal young woman. A few months later I had my second surgery to remove a dysfunctional gallbladder. I felt relieve that maybe this was the cause of my pain and I could be free of it and I could embrace my freshmen year of college pain free. I proceed to have pain and go through treatment after treatment, doctor visit after doctor visit, and have no answers and no relief. In fall of 2002, I had another surgery, and finally a diagnosis of endometriosis. Little did I know what this would mean. I would begin a life-long journey of physical and emotional pain that has no cure.
 
I know you’ve tried both conventional treatment for endometriosis and NaPro Technology treatment. Can you tell me about your experience with each of these approaches?
As I said there is no official cure for endometriosis. Contraceptives, pregnancy, and NaPro Technology have helped many women. However, contraceptives and NaPro Technology have not helped me. For five years I was on a roller coaster ride trying anything and everything for a cure. I went from trying conventional methods to NaPro technology. Conventional methods seemed to be band-aids just covering the endometriosis but not even treating the symptoms. I was drained emotionally and felt broken and worthless as a woman. I felt NaPro technology and Creighton Model Charting gave back my dignity. I was not taking any synthetic drugs and I was able to learn my body’s rhythms and what was my normal cycle. I was able to begin to love my body and accept it as a gift. I was unable to continue treatment with the NaPro as there were no clinic near me and long distance was not working for me at the time. In 2007 I turned back to mainstream methods. I began taking the Depo-Provera shot in eight week intervals and Arimidex daily, a drug used in breast cancer therapy. I was only able to take this regimen until I turned 30, as it increases one’s chances of heart disease and osteoporosis.
 
You say fertility charting gave you back your dignity. Can you explain a little more about that?
Learning the Creighton method I learn how indeed I am wonderfully made. While using the Creighton model and not taking any form of birth control, my body was able to return to its natural rhythms. At this time I feel I experienced the power of being a woman. By learning how my body cycles to work with a man’s body to produce life and learning my mucous and how it changes through the cycle I could see and feel this gift that only a woman has. Through this experience I found value in my body, and found my worth and dignity.

The relief I received from NaPro was short term as in my case I have microscopic endometriosis and it is most likely that all the endometrial implants were not visible during my surgery and were unable to be removed, and because of that I still experienced pain after the surgery. I would however seek NaPro again if future surgery is recommended.

 
Have you tried any other approaches?
I currently am trying a Naturopath physician who uses herbal treatment and diet changes. I was pain free last month and so far so good in March. I have not started my period since coming off Depo and Arimidex last fall but being pain free the last two month gives me hope in this current option. However I am waiting for insurance coverage to fully participate in the Naturopath treatments.
 
Instead of viewing the female capabilities as burdens, New Feminism seeks to honor and celebrate them. But the fact remains that some women’s bodies do not function normally. Maybe they experience infertility, have difficulty birthing vaginally or breastfeeding. Some women just aren’t mothers and so the whole breastfeeding and birthing thing is outside of their experience. As a single woman without children, and one who has a severe menstrual disorder, what do you think New Feminism can offer women like you?
I think we live in a very broken world. Part of that is believing we are flawed and that our bodies are flawed. In my case my body does not function like text books say it should. It is an ongoing challenge for me to love and accept myself as I am. New Feminism gives me the chance to share my experience of being a woman with other women. I find it gives me power to say I am a woman and though my female organs don’t work “normally” I still have power. I can still love passionately; I can be tender, warm, and understanding. These are not weaknesses. They are strengths. I can nurture and give life purpose and give meaning to others’ suffering through my own suffering. I channel this energy to family members, friends, patients, and anyone I meet daily that needs to be loved. Being a nurse I have lots of opportunities to use my feminine abilities to comfort those in my care. I am a woman!
 
Many women experience an enormous sense of accomplishment and empowerment when they discover they can birth children and breastfeed them. Conversely, when women have difficulty with these things, it can rock their sense of self and they can experience such heartbreak and feel like they are failures as women. Again, as someone with your health issues, and as someone who may be unable to have natural children, do you think women with these difficulties can find empowerment in another way? Or might you have any ideas about how they might learn to value themselves as women and cherish their femininity?
I wish I could say I had the once and for all fix to this sense of failure and heartbreak that comes when we can’t fulfill the role of being a natural mother. My faith and good friends have helped me in this area, but it is an ongoing challenge. I have to work at it. Some days I want to go for a long run or walk and my body says no you can’t. Some days I have to sit and enjoy the sunset from the porch instead of the beach, but I try to be thankful for the ability to still see the sunset. I try to embrace my body, love it, and work with it. Some days I do get down to the beach! The key is staying one with my body and one with my feelings. When I deny my normal and my natural for what the world or mainstream society says should be my normal, is when I lose ground.